23rd Sunday in Ordinary Time (A) – September 10, 2023

St. Paul – Lyons, KS

Ezekiel 33:7-9; Psalm 95:1-2, 6-9; Romans 13:8-10; Matthew 18:15-20

Introduction: Reconciliation & Forgiveness

Today we start a new section of Matthew’s Gospel, and a new series—a brief, two-week series. Today we begin the fourth of the five discourses of Jesus in Matthew’s Gospel, the fourth large section of Jesus’ teachings, Matthew 18. And this discourse is usually called the “Discourse on the Church.” It’s like Jesus is answering the question, “Alright, so here’s this group of people that has placed their faith you—how does this group operate?” And so it’s a really important discourse for us, because it gives us clear instructions about what is going to be very important as a group of people that have entrusted our lives to him. So what’s the first thing Jesus talks about? What’s going to be very important for us? Two things: reconciliation, and forgiveness.

Reconciliation and forgiveness. Jesus isn’t dumb. He knows that in a fallen and broken world (broken by human sin, broken by darker forces at work)—in a world like ours, people are going to mess up. The two great commandments, love God and love neighbor? Yeah, guess what? People aren’t always going to live those out perfectly. Shocking, I know! And because of that, well, two things we’re going to need to get really good at are reconciliation and forgiveness. Today he digs into the topic of reconciliation, and then next week it’s the topic of forgiveness. 

And I want you to notice: these are incredibly relevant to us, all of us here today. And they’re two things that we’re not very good at. Typically what we do (typically) is we just kind of drop things, or we bury things, or we put on a good face—but we never really deal with it. And Jesus is saying, “That’s not an option.” Why? “Cuz Jesus said so”? No. Because not dealing with it doesn’t actually fix things, and actually it makes them worse, and actually it’s very dangerous for others but also for us. Because when we don’t address something, when we don’t deal with it, it just festers and eats away at us. And I know you know what I’m talking about. I’ve seen it happen in my own life, I’ve seen it happen in many of your lives, and I’ve seen in happen in this parish. So as uncomfortable as it is, I would really encourage you to pay attention to these parts of Matthew. And when the Lord stirs something up in your heart don’t just shove it back down. Begin to pray with it, take it to God, and beg him for the path forward. Ok?

So today, Jesus tackles the first topic: reconciliation. And we can ask the question this way: What do you do, what do we do, when someone who says that they have faith in Jesus—they are a Christian, a Catholic—what do you do when a member of our parish, a Catholic—what do you do when they’re living their life in such a way that their words, “I believe in Jesus Christ” do not match their life? What do you do with hypocrites: they attend church on Sunday, but Monday through Saturday they are living completely contrary to their faith? What do you do with someone who is giving scandal? What do you do with people that say, “I’m Catholic”—but they don’t live it, they don’t ever go to Mass, they don’t pray, they don’t follow the teachings of the Church, they encourage people not to follow the teachings of the Church, they openly live in a situation that is contrary to the teaching of Christ? Can you think of anyone like that? Here in town? Ok: What are we to do? Matthew 18.

Two Ways to Hear Jesus’ Teaching

There are two ways we can typically hear this teaching of Jesus, though. Does anyone here work in H.R.? Or have you ever been a manager and had to fire people? Do you know how that works? It’s a several step process: first you make notes on their performance review of a substandard performance; then you continue to document their poor performance, have others document it; then you give them an improvement plan; and when they don’t live up to the improvement plan, then you can fire them.

And this is often how people read this teaching of Jesus! Here is someone that is obstinately sinning, or they keep calling themselves Catholic but really live their life contrary to the teachings of the Church, whatever it is—how do you kick them out? Well, first go talk to them one-on-one, then bring a few others, then have the Church talk to them—and then you can kick them out!

But think of it a different way. Some of you won’t have to imagine too hard—but imagine that your brother (who you love very much, who is married, has a few young kids)—imagine that your brother is struggling with an addiction to alcohol or drugs. Imagine that he’s been struggling with it for a while. And you get calls from your sister-in-law, his wife, every once in a while about how bad it is, or how the kids are really struggling, how painful it is—he can’t hold down a job, she worries about what he might do when he’s drunk or high. Ok: What are you going to do? You’re going to go talk to your brother, tell him what’s going on, beg him to get some help! And if he does’t listen, you talk to him with a few of his friends. And if that doesn’t work, what do you do? You plan an intervention: you bring a group of people together. And why? Why do you do this? Because you love him, you care for him, you want things to change! You go to the ends of the earth to help him! But if he still refuses? It breaks your heart, but you start talking to your sister-in-law about how she might need to take the kids and move out.

Or a different scenario: imagine that your brother (who you love very much, who is married, has a few young kids)—imagine you find out that your brother is cheating on his wife. What are you going to do? You’re going to tell that guy to get his life in order. And if he doesn’t, you’ll get someone else to come talk to him with you. And then you’ll say, “If you don’t end this, if you don’t tell your wife—we’re going to.” Why do you do this? Because you love him, you care for him, and you care for your sister-in-law and your nieces and nephews. And you know he’s putting everything in his life in jeopardy!

Ok, do you see how this is completely different than the first way of listening to Jesus’ teaching? In the first case, you’re trying to get rid of someone, you’re trying to fire them—so you jump through the hoops to get them out of your company, out of your life. But in the second? It’s your brother. You’re heartbroken. You see the pain and suffering and brokenness caused by their actions, and so you do whatever you can to fix it! With the alcoholic, we call out their sin, their problem, because we know it’s threatening not only their life, but their marriage, the safety and well-being of their wife and children. With the cheating spouse, we don’t just pat them on the back and say, “Well, we all mess up in life.” No, you say, “Dude, this is serious. What are you doing? You need to fix this.” Are you with me?

The Lost Sheep

Ok, so when we hear this teaching of Jesus, we need to make sure we hear it in the second way. Jesus is not trying to tell us how we can get rid of annoying people, or get rid of annoying parishioners. Jesus has something else in mind. And we know this how? Because of the story that comes right before this. Right before Jesus gives this teaching on reconciliation, he tells a parable that you’re probably very familiar with: “If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine…and go in search of the stray?…In just the same way, it is not the will of your heavenly Father that one of these little ones be lost” (Mt. 18:12-14).

When Jesus is talking about this process of reconciliation, he’s talking about a ministry of love. Why do we engage in this process Jesus talks about? Why should we do something so uncomfortable as confronting people for their sin? Because we love them, we care about them. Like that shepherd, we go in search of the lost and straying sheep. We go after them not to shame them, and tell them what we really think, and then kick them out, no. What does Jesus say, “If you go and talk to him, and if he listens to you, you have won over your brother.” The purpose isn’t to kick them out, it’s to win them back! This person is so valuable to you, so loved by you, that we go after them. We go talk to them ourself. And if they don’t listen, we get a few more people to help us. And if that does’t work, we get the whole Church to go after them! Why? Because they’re worth it! Because if we really care about them we’re not going to leave them in that dangerous situation, we’re not going to pretend everything is OK.

Because the flip side of this is that it isn’t just a problem for them, it’s a problem for us. Why don’t we do this? Why do we let these things slide? Why do we overlook this? Because deep down we don’t really care about them, we don’t really love them—or we don’t think what they’re doing is a big deal. And that’s not just a them problem anymore—it’s an “us” problem—and it’s dangerous for us. Why? Go to our first reading from Ezekiel: “If you do not speak out to dissuade the wicked from his way, the wicked shall die for his guilt, but I will hold you responsible for his death” (Ezekiel 33:8). If your brother is an alcoholic, and you do nothing, and he ends up hurting his wife or kids—yeah, he’s going to jail for that, but you have to live with the fact that you did nothing. If your brother is cheating on his wife, and you do nothing, you say, “Eh, no big deal”—yeah, he’s the one guilty of that sin, but now it’s on you too.

“God has entrusted us with the message of reconciliation”

Not going after the lost sheep is not an option. It’s not.  You’re all good people, good and loving people. I know that if your brother was an alcoholic you wouldn’t let that slide. If he was putting your sister-in-law and nieces and nephews in danger, you would’t let that slide—it would eat you up inside that that was going on. And you also wouldn’t invite him to the bar or feed their addiction. If you brother was stepping out on your sister-in-law and kids, you wouldn’t think, “Eh, no big deal. He’s a good person deep down.” You wouldn’t go golfing with him and pretend everything was ok. You wouldn’t act like nothing was wrong. But when it comes to our faith… 

In our faith, what we do is engage in a covenantal relationship with God and with His people. By your baptism, by receiving Communion, you’re engaging in a covenantal relationship with God and His people. Being a Christian, a Catholic—it’s not just saying, “I believe God exists.” It’s saying, “I have given my life to God. I will live in this covenantal relationship the way He teaches me through the Church. I am going to be faithful to God and His people in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, love them and honor them all the days of my life.” And so when someone who says that they have faith in Jesus, they are a Christian, a Catholic—when a member of our parish, a Catholic—what do you do when they are living their life in such a way that they are harming or breaking this covenant, living their life contrary to the teachings of the Church, not coming to Mass, encouraging others not to live as the Church teaches? Jesus’ instructions are clear: you need to go after those lost sheep, you need to go after them even more than you would for your brother who’s an alcoholic or unfaithful husband! Why? Because it’s a matter of life and death.

People say being a Christian means to love God and love your neighbor. Good! True! It does! But do you “love your neighbor” enough to go after the lost, to call them out on their sin, to bring them back? Jesus’ words aren’t a way for us to feel better about someone who is a “lost cause.” They are a challenge to go after the lost sheep, to reconcile them to God. Why? ‘Cuz they’re worth it, they’re that valuable, they’re that important. Like that little verse before the Gospel said, “God reconciled the world to himself, but now entrusts the message of reconciliation to us.” Yeah, being a good Christian means to love God and love neighbor. But this is where we have to ask: do I love my neighbor enough to do this?